In a recent conversation with a client, we were discussing sadness, sad days, flat days, feeling down.
…And I got to thinking,
If I could create the world from scratch, would I create it without sadness?
Would I disallow all negative events and emotions and allow only utopian contentment for all inhabitants? - That is after all our idea of paradise isn’t it?
Well that may well be, but here’s the thing – how would we know Joy? Love? Belonging? If we never experienced sadness, hatred or rejection?
I’m glad I don’t have the job of creating the world anew, because, like everyone else, I would find it very hard to allow some of the tragedies and traumas that people experience.
AND now more than ever, we are striving for a safe, non-confrontational world, where no-one ever offends anyone else, and human interaction is expected to occur only within the boundaries of ever-changing degrees of acceptability..
We postulate, litigate and prescribe drugs to ease grief, confusion and self-doubt, in a never-ending search for ‘happiness’. But happiness is a choice, pure and simple it doesn’t come from external sources and sometimes it doesn’t come from within either, perhaps because ‘now’ might not be the right time to feel happy and you know, that’s OK too.
Now don’t shout at me for this, but consider for one moment that maybe we need to know adversity, feel sadness, experience trauma.
It is these experiences, from which we learn to grow and develop individually and globally. It is by experiencing our own tragedies and traumas that we learn compassion and increase our understanding of ourselves and the needs of others. Only by experiencing sadness, loneliness and fear can we begin to develop the compassion for other earth dwellers (two-legged, four-legged, six-legged…).
For those who have passed before us, those with whom we share this time and for those who are yet to come, we experience hardship and adversity. We do so, that we might pass on all that we have learned to others; so we can experience Joy; and so we can contribute to the ongoing evolution of life on earth.
Most of the adversity we experience in life, at some point or another spurs us on to the next challenge, or makes a change in our lives that wouldn’t have occurred by any other means. We don’t have to pretend to enjoy the process or relish going through it, but stuff happens and sometimes we go through a period of transition that may sometimes seem unbearable. Ultimately we heal and find a new version of ourselves emerges. Next time you have a ‘down’ day, rather than berating yourself, or feeling like it is a ‘waste of time’ - you could choose to think of it as a time for reflection, growth and understanding. Like the butterfly that emerges radiant from its bonds, you could consider yourself to be having a ‘chrysalis’ day.
Whichever kind of day you are having today, whatever cycle of life you are currently passing through I wish you peace today and every day.